How To Write Your Life Story

What do you know about structure and execution?

Capture your memories for your loved ones

I once came across a quote by the author Kate Rockland, which read: “Relationships consist of telling your same life stories to different people until someone finally appreciates them.” Although, a little on the soppy side, this idea about the power of the life story and the realization that our stories literally make us did really hit home.

Now, most people wouldn’t consider themselves storytellers and definitely wouldn’t consider themselves authors. But really, that is exactly what we are; storytellers. By going about our day-to-day lives we are unwittingly writing our own stories. By telling our spouses about our days, we are telling stories. We create and develop plot lines, settings, and characters, which together make up the stories of our lives.

So why is recording our stories such a daunting task? It is often down to a lack of time and the fear of not knowing how or where to begin.

 
“Relationships consist of telling your same life stories to different people until someone finally appreciates them.”
 

With regard to the time issue, or rather, the mindset issue – it is notable that one of the most common excuses for not doing things is because we don’t have the time. Why not start by substituting one hour of television per week with writing instead?

Writing doesn’t have to be a chore, it doesn't necessarily even need to be a conscious effort. Writing anything, even on the most basic level can serve as a record of our life stories.

In this age of selfies and hashtags, we are constantly telling millions of people our stories, every day. Social media has advanced the ways and means to tell stories. Sharing a selfie, wearing smart clothes with a cheesy grin on your face, accompanied by the caption: ‘So #excited for the #firstday of my new job!' tells a story. But how exactly do we go about converting all these snippets of our lives into a life story?

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How do I get started?

Most stories have a relatively clear beginning, middle and end, separated into chapters, with characters and settings. When you begin to break things down to the most basic level, your stories start to make a little more sense. Consequently, writing your life story becomes a slightly less daunting task.

Beginning: this could be your family before you, your birth, your early childhood memories

Middle: the significant events that have made up the bulk of your life

End: this can be where you are now, your current relationships and your plans for the future

We've put together a super-handy list of questions to recall some of those forgotten memories, as well as a free downloadable timeline to get you started on your life story. You can find these here:

The Memory Prompt Cheat Sheet

Creating a Timeline of Your Life

Okay, I've done that. What now?

Execution is often the most difficult and daunting part as ‘blank page syndrome’ tends to affect us all. As a result, we procrastinate. Luckily for us, however, professional biographer, Andrew Crofts, has provided some insight into how best to approach making sense of our memories:

“The best thing is to write from memory first because then the most interesting and important events and characters will rise to the surface. Then go through all the source material like diaries to check that you have got the facts right and that you haven't forgotten anything vital.

“If you find the idea of writing a book daunting, start out by imagining you are writing a letter to a long-lost friend, telling them everything that has happened since you last saw them. That way your natural voice will come through.

“Getting the first block of material down is always the hardest part. Editing, tweaking and expanding are the fun bits once the bulk of the project has been done.”

Remember, writing your life story is not the same as writing a memoir. If this is news to you, check out our Memoir vs Autobiography: What's the Difference? article.

Overall, it is important to maintain a balanced structure throughout your ‘life story’, so it feels like just that; a ‘life story’ and not just one of 'life’s many stories’.

 
Written by Amber Hicks

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